The Red and White 2 : Red, White and Beautiful Read online

  Red,WhiteandBeautiful

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  Copyright©2013BecBotefuhr

  PublishedbyBecBotefuhr,July2013

  Red,WhiteandBeautifulisaworkoffiction.Allnames, characters,placesandeventsportrayedinthisbookeitherarefromthe author’simaginationorareusedfictitiously.Anysimilaritytoreal persons,livingordead,establishments,events,orlocationispurely coincidentalandnotintendedbytheauthor.Pleasedonottakeoffence tothecontent,asitisFICTION.

  **Thisstoryinnowayrepresentswhatshould,could,wouldor doeshappeninregardstothisstoryline.Itismerelyafictionalstory andnoneofthecontentshouldbetakenseriously.Idon’treally believethesethingsactuallyhappennoramItryingtostatethatthey do.Itisnothingmorethanfictionandshouldbetakenasexactlythat.

  Youhavebeenwarned.Thankyouforreading.**

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  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  Ihavealotofpeopletothank,butthatwouldjusttakeupmyentire page.SoI’mgoingtothankthosewhocometomindfirst.

  ThankyoutoWendyBraggYoderfortakingthetimeouttodoa finalreadyforme.WhenmyeyeswereburningandIcouldn’tpossibly readitoncemoretime,youcameforwardanddidafinalrunthroughfor me.Thankyousoverymuch.

  TothegirlsatTripleMbookclub,forbeingtheabsolutebest support.Theyhavebeenmycrazy,beautifulsupportersandhaveread everythingI’vedone,encouragingmeevenwhenIwantedtostop.You girlsaremybackbone.

  ToMelodyMestricforbeingmycrazy,soulcrushingotherhalfthat knowsexactlywhattosayallthetime.ErrrNerr,you’rethetwinInever had,I’msuretheytoreusapartatbirthbecauseyou’rethesamekinda weirdIamandinweirdness,welove.

  ToHollyCarterforalwaysofferingtoreadwhatIwrite,even thoughyou’vegotenoughon.Forlisteningtomyphonecallsforhours andhoursandtalkingtomeabouteverythingandanything(Yeahyou knowwhatImean).Kindredspiritsiswhatweare.

  ToDawnMartensforalwayshelpingmeedit,eventhoughyou’re writingyourownbooks.Forbeingcrazy,honestandtruenomatter what.You’rethekindofpersonthatwillremainwithmeforever, becauseyou’rereal.

  ToMelissaDiamondforreadingandre-readingallmywork.For textingmewithOMGandHOLYSHITjusttoletmeknowyou’re feelin’whatI’mwriting.You’reamazingandyouknowIloveyou.

  Sotoalltheabove,onedayI’llpashallofyou!!

  PROLOGUE

  MARCUS

  Goddammit.Goddammit.HowcouldIletthishappen?Howthe fuckcouldIletherfindoutaboutallthis,andinthatway?Shedidn’t deservethat.Shedidn’tdeservetohearaboutmehiringherafter knowingshehadbeenabused.Shedidn’tdeservetohearmesayingI wantedtoprotectafiancéIdon’tevenlikerightnow.Whatthefuckis wrongwithme?Whythefuckdidn’tIjusttellChaynetogetoutand keepSierrawithme,safe,inmyarms?Sheworkedherassofftryingto helpmeandIthrewitbackinherface.Goddammit.Islammyfistdown ontothehardwoodendesk,cursingloudlyasIpacetheroom.Fuck Chayneandherbullshitgames,fuckthewholesituation.OnlyIcouldget myselftangledupinthismess,Idon’tfuckingthink,Ijustdo.That’smy goddamnedproblem.

  “Sir,areyouok?”

  IturntoseeRosestandingatthedoorlookingweary,asifshe doesn’twanttostepfurtherin,justincaseIsnapather.It’sprobably smartreally,becauserightnowIprobablywould.

  “I’mfine,”Ibark,thenclosemyeyes.FuckitMarcus,thisisn’ther fault.Stopbeinganass.“SorryRose,I’mfine.”

  “Chaynewentstormingout;Ithoughtperhapssomethingwas wrong.”

  “FuckChayne.”

  “Issomethinggoingonbetweenthetwoofyou?Where’sSierra?”

  “Shequit,”Isaygruffly,grippingthesideofthedeskwithmyhand andsqueezinguntilithurts.

  “Oh.I’msorry.Whathappened?”

  LieMarcus,don’tletherknowwhatwenton.Thisisyourjob.Your career.Notonlythat,it’sSierra’sfuturethatcouldgotoshit,somake somethingup.

  “Shehadfamilyproblems.”

  “Oh,that’sterrible.ShallIfindanotherassistant?”

  Fuck.“Yeah,thatwouldbegood.”

  “Youhaveameetingintenminutes,wouldyoulikemetocancelit?”

  “No,”Isay,takingadeepbreathandpickingupmybriefcase.“I havetoattendthisone.”

  “Oksir,ifthere’sanythingyouneed,justcall.”

  “ThanksRose.”

  Whensheleaves,Istareatthedoor.Itryhardtoignorethesharp, stabbingpaininmyheartbecauseIdon’twanttothinkaboutwhatSierra isdoingrightnow.Idon’twanttothinkaboutherhurtface,orthetears thatmightbestaininghercheeks.Idon’twanttothinkaboutanyofit, andyetIcan’tshakeitfrommyhead.Ifuckedup.Pureandsimple.I don’tknowhowtofixit,allIknow,isthatrightnowIhavetogeton withmyday.That’sthejobI’min,sadly.Idon’tgettostop,nomatter whatlifethrowsatme.Perhapsit’sagoodthing,becauseifIstop…I mightactuallybreak.Andbreakingisnotanoption.

  Notnow.

  Notever.

  CHAPTER1

  SIERRA

  “Right,that’sit!Getyoursorryassoutofthisbed,beforeIputmy footupit.”

  Igrumbleandslapmypillowatthesoundofmybestfriend, Quinn’s,voice.HegripsthecottonblanketsI’vesoperfectlywrapped aroundmeandyanksthemback,exposingmyskintothecold,chillyair.

  Icurseathimandrollfrommystomach,tomyback.Throughbleary eyes,Iglareupathim.Hesmiles,atrulydazzlingfeaturetohisface,and thenleansdownandgripsmywrist.Don’teventhinkaboutitQuinn,do not…hedoes.HepullsmesohardIslideoutofbedandlandwitha thumponthefloor.JesusChrist,hedoesn’tdothingsinhalfmeasures, themanisagoddamnedmachine.Imakealoudgrowlingsoundandhuff loudly.Dammit,thathurt.

  “Quinn!”Icry,gettingtomykneesandrubbingmysorebackside.

  Hethrowshishandsonhishipsandglaresdownatme,hiseyes narrowedwithdetermination.Great.AdeterminedQuinnissomething youdon’tchallenge.“Youarenotspendinganotherdayinthisbed,Sierra Walters,Iwon’thaveit.Sowhat,yougotdumped…”

  “Ididnotgetdumped,”Isay,cuttinghimoff.Ihatethatword,I trulydo.Dumped.It’shorrible.“Ileft.”

  “Whatever.Eitherway,you’regettingoutofthisdamnedbedand
gettingonwithyourlife.Apieceofassisreallynotenoughtohaveyou mopinginbedalldaylong.Getoverit,moveon,andgetsomedamn sunshine,youlooklikeafreakin’zombie.”

  Icrossmyarmsandgivehimanamusedexpression.“Azombie, Quinn?Really?”

  “Seriously,Icansmellbitsofyourskinrottingoff.”Hesays laughing.

  “Ishowered!”Iprotest,gettingtomyfeetwithagroan.Goddammit, ontopofmysad,tiredbody,myassisnowsore.

  “Well,forgoodmeasure,you’regoingtoshoweragainandthen we’regoingoutforbreakfast.Andyouaregoingtotellmewhatthehell happenedbetweenyouandhotstuff.”

  “Don’tcallhimthat,he’sanass,”Igrumble,attemptingtorunmy fingersthroughthemassofknotsthatusedtobemyhair.

  “Anassthathadyouhauledupinbedforfivedays.”

  Igivehimasourlook.“Allright,genius,pointtaken.I’llshower.”

  “That’smygirl,”hecoo’s,chuckingmeunderthechin.

  Igivehimanothersourexpression,thenjerkmyheadwhena thoughtcomestomind.Thisisgood,consideringI’veblockedall thoughtsforthepastfivedays.It’seasierthatway.Right?“Hey,didyou talktotheprofessoraboutfillingthepositionasMarcus’PA?”

  Quinnnods,hiseyessoftenjustatouch.“Yeah,theyputatempin.”

  MystomachclencheswhenIthinkofanotherwomanworkingwith Marcus.ItclenchesevenmorewhenIthinkabouttheaffectthiscould haveonmyoverallscoresfortheyear.“DoyouthinkI’llgetbadscores forthis?”

  Heshakeshishead.“Noway,itwasjustagoodopportunity,notan essentialpartofyourstudy.Speakingofstudying,youreallyneedtoget yourassbackintoit.”

  “Yes,yes,”Isay,wavingmyhand.“Iknow.”

  “Well,first,you’regoingtoshowerandwe’regoingout.”

  “Youalreadysaidthat,”Ipointout,diggingthroughmyclosetfor someclothes.

  “Wellgetcrackin’,we’vegotlotstotalkabout,”hesays,clapping hishandsloudly.

  “Aye,boss.”Imurmurbeforewalkingintotheshower.

  Thiscouldbealongday.

  ~*~*~*~*~

  SIERRA

  OnceI’mshoweredanddressed,Quinndragsmeouttoourlocal coffeeshop.Wetakeaseatandpeeratourmenus.Ireallyhaven’tbeen outinthelastfivedaysanditfeelsalittlestrangenow,butIknowQuinn isright,IhavetomoveonfromMarcus.I’mtryingto.I’mtryingto acceptheneverwantedmeformorethanaquesttogetmetotrusthim andsubmit.Iknowthis,butitdoesn’tmeanitdoesn’thurt.Itdoeshurt.

  Everyday.BecauseIfellinlovewithhim,andthat’snotsomethingI giveeasily.Ifeelbetrayedintheworstpossibleway,andaddingChayne ontopjustmakesitawholelotworse.Idon’tunderstandwhyheprotects her,perhapsIneverwill,becausemaybeI’llneverfindsomeoneIcare about,asmuchashecaredabouther.ThoughI’mfairlysureIcareabout himthatmuch,maybehejustcan’tseeit.OrmaybeIjustdon’tknow love,andI’mlivinginafantasy.Yes,thatworks.

  “So,hewouldn’tbusthisfiancéforcheatingtogetridofher?”

  QuinnsaysandIsnapmyheadup,swallowingandthennodding.

  “That’saboutit.”

  Ididn’tbothertellingQuinnthatMarcushadfoundoutaboutwhat Bendidtomeandpickedmebecausehefeltlikeanewsubmissive.

  ThereareonlysomanythingsQuinnneedstoknowaboutmeandthatis notoneofthem.Hewouldn’tunderstandanyway.Heck,Idon’teven understand,sohowcanIexpectanyoneelseto?

  “Doyouthinkhestilllovesher?”

  Ishrug,twirlingastrandofhairaroundmyfinger.That’saquestion I’verefusedtoallowmyselftothinkabout.Idon’twanttothinkthathe protectedherbecausepartofhimisstillinlovewithher.IfIthinkabout that,Iwon’tcomebackfromit.So,IjustgiveQuinnastockanswer.“I don’thonestlyknow.”

  “Ithinkhe’sscaredaboutwhatwillhappenifhetakesthatfinalstep, youknow?Yourunningoutwouldn’thavehelpedmakeuphismind.”

  IgiveQuinnasourlook.“Oh,soit’smyfaultnow?”

  Quinnraiseshisbrows.“Neversaiditwasyourfault,honey.Isaid yourunningwouldn’thavegivenhimmuchreasontothinkyouwould stay.”

  “Iknowthat,ok?”Isigh,puttingmyheadinmyhands.Ilovehow QuinncanmakemefeelbadaboutsomethingthatIdidn’tdo.

  “Hashetriedtocall?”

  “Idon’tknow,Ihaven’tcheckedmyphone.”

  “Doyouwanttoseehimagain?”

  IgiveQuinntheeye.“Whyallthequestions?”

  “I’mtryingtofigureoutwhatyoucando.”

  “Idon’tknowwhattodo,Quinn.Ijusthavetoleaveitandletitgo.”

  “Isthatwhatyouwant?”

  Ithrowmyhandsupandsnap,“Ofcourseit’snot,Quinn,butwhat elsecanIdo?”

  “Talktohim?”hesays,rollinghiseyesasifthatanswerwasso horriblyobvious.

  “Ican’ttalktohim,”Isay,crossingmyarmsandrubbingmyhands togetheranxiously.

  Quinnsighsloudly.“Sometimeswoman,I’msureyou’remore immaturethanafifteenyearoldgirl.”

  “Goodlord,”Isay,thenburstoutintoafitofgiggles.

  Quinnfollows,unabletocontainhisamusement.Whenthewaiter stopsbythetable,Ismothermygigglesandturntohim.Goditfeels goodtolaugh.Itfeelsgoodtodoanythingelsebutmopeandcry.

  “WhatcanIgetyouboth?”heasks,lettinghiseyestravelbetween thetwoofuswithconfusionandalittleamusement.

  “I’llhavetheeggsbenedictandacoffeeplease,”Ismile,handing himthemenu.

  “Samehere.”

  Thewaitersmilesatusandthenwalksoff.Quinnturnsbacktome, hisfaceisalittlemoreseriousthistime.

  “Iknowwhereyoucanseehim,totalk.”

  Ifeelmyeyeswiden.“IhaveaphoneifIfeeltheneedtohavemy heartrippedoutagain.”

  “That’snotthewaytogoaboutthis,youneedtoseehim.”

  “WhatforQuinn?Hedoesn’twantme.Hemadethatclearby choosingher.”

  “Hedidn’treallychooseher,”Quinnsayssoftly,daringtomeetmy eyeswithhis.

  “Iknow,but,Ishouldhavenevergonethereinthefirstplace.Thisis forthebest.”

  “Doyoulovehim,Sierra?”

  IfeelmyeyeswellwithtearsandIstruggletoswallowthelumpin mythroat.“Yes,Ido.”

  “Thenyouoweittoyourselftoeitherenditproperlyorworkitout.”

  Iclosemyeyesamoment,Iknowhe’sright.IknowIneedtotalk withMarcus,atleasttofinishthisforgood,buttheideaofseeinghim againburnsme.Theideaoflookingintothosedeepbrowneyesand seeingtheconflictinthem,hasmewoundupinside.WhatifMarcushas alreadymovedonwithChayne?CanIdealwiththat?CanIdealwith knowingforsurethathechoseher?Orwhatifhewantsmeback?CanI dealwithgoingbackandfeelinglikeIalwayscomesecondtoawoman whodoesn’tevencareabouthim?Theanswersareblurryandthe questionsareharsh,Idon’tknowifIcandealwitheitherofthem,butI knowIhaveto.

  “OkQuinn,”Isayinasmallvoice.“I’lltalktohimandfigurethis out.”

  “Tonightthere’sadinnerforthesponsorsoftheuniversity.He’sone ofthem,sohe’llbethere.Allstudentsinthestudentcouncilareableto come,thatincludesmeandyou.Sowe’regoing.”

  Inod,swallowing.TheideaofseeingMarcusagainistestingevery strengthinsideme,butI’mnotgoingtospendtherestoftheyear wallowingbecauseIlostanopportunityandfellinlove.Whenthewaiter bringsourfood,QuinnandIeatinsilence,bothofusarecontemplating howtheeveningwillgo.WillMarcusevenspeaktome?Willheorder metoleaveorrubChayneinmyface?Ireallydon’tknow,andtheidea ofnotknow
ingbothersme.Whatiftheentirestudentbodyfiguresout whathappenedbetweenus?Whatifhemakesascene?God,somany thingscouldgowrong.

  “Areyousurethisisagoodidea?”IsaytoQuinn.

  Hiseyesscanmyface.“Ithinkso.Youneedtofixthisorendit, Sierra.Eitherway,ithastobedoneoryou’regoingtofailallyourexams andlosesomethingyou’veworkedhardfor.You’relettinghimgetto you,andIunderstandwhy,butyouhavetoletitgo.Maybehe’lltakeyou back,andyou’llbehappyagain.Eitherway,ithastobedoneforyour sake,nothis.Youcandothis,you’resomuchstrongerthanthis.Iwillbe therewithyou,ok?Ipromise.”

  Inod,swallowing.“Thankyou,Quinn.”

  “Anytime.Now,let’sgoshoppingandgetyousomethingdeadsexy towear.”

  Ismile,Ican’thelpit.Quinnlovesshoppinganditwillbegoodto dosomethingdifferent.“Ok.”

  Hereachesacrossthetableandtakesmyhand,rubbinghisfinger overmypalms.“You’reabravegirl.IknowI’vepushedyouandmade youfacethisbutIamreallyproudofyou,Sierra.Youhaven’tbroken downoractedcrazy.You’reanamazinggirlandIthinkyou’redoingthe rightthing.”

  Inod,swallowingandbitingmylowerlip.Quinnsmilesand squeezesmyhand.

  “Thankyou,”Iwhisper,meetinghisgaze.

  “Anytime,honey,anytime.”

  “Well,”Isay,diggingintomybreakfast.“Let’sfinisheatingsowe cangoshopping.”

  Quinn’sbeamingsmilelightensmymood.Likeitalwaysdoes.

  “That’smygirl.”

  Well,fingerscrossedthisgoeswell.

  CHAPTER2

  MARCUS

  “Sir,yoursuitisready.”

  IlookupfrommydeskandseeRosestandingatthedoor,holdinga perfectlypressedsuit.Inodather,andshewalksin,hangingitonacoat hook.

  “Isthereanythingelse?”sheasks.

  “No,thanksRose.”